I seem to have turned into a Soviet era border guard.

You present papers comrade. I check.
What is this? Very irregular. I think a donation to the glorious Movember Revolution will be needed to get your papers in order. Otherwise Gulag. Very painful, very cold in Gulag. Much better you donate.
Click this link, comrade:
https://www.movember.com/au/donate/donate-details.php?action=sponsorlink&rego=1475081&country=au
and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account, or
Write a cheque payable to ‘Movember Foundation’, referencing Glorious People’s Registration Number 1475081 and mail it to:
Movember Foundation
PO Box 292
Prahran VIC 3181
Attempting to cross border in presence of Alex also a good opportunity to donate in person.
Remember, all donations over $2 are tax deductible.