The year is 2021. It is the afternoon, and in the habit of teenagers everywhere, Luc Kidman is just waking up.
Disgracefully Aging Alex: “Luc, wake up. You need to go and walk the hyperdog”
Slothful Teen Luc: “Just gimme fiiiiiive more minutes sleep…”
How did I get this vision of the future, I hear you ask?*
I think this photo gives me something of a vision of that future, not so far away…
Spooky, isn’t it?
Actually, having spent three weeks now as the sole daytime carer of Luc, I’m beginning to think that he’s got something of a drink problem. Let’s review the classic AA symptoms:
What’s the first thing he wants when he gets up? A drink.
Does he often require a drink to help him get to sleep? Yes.
Does he become violent and noisy when he hasn’t had a drink? Yes.
Does his drinking lead to incontinence, blurred speech and poor muscle control? Yes.
Clearly, an intervention is needed. Sure, he’s only a Mummy-milkaholic at this stage, but considering the source can’t even be viewed on TV screens before 9pm at night (and even then only with a specific warning before the program is broadcast), it’s clearly a “gateway drug”. Next thing you know, he’ll be demanding rice crackers (actually, he does this already) and mainlining Milo…
* Well, OK, I didn’t actually hear you. It’s a figure of speech…
Two thoughts:
(1) What’s the point of having a hyperdog if it can’t walk itself?
(2) Why would a teenager say “Just gimme fiiiiiive more minutes sleep” when “Hnnnf” would suffice?
(1) That’s a feature promised for Hyperdog 7. I’m not made of money, y’know. Back in my day, you could buy a litre of petrol for under $100. It’s true!
(2) “Hnnnf” would be a greeting. You think a teenager’s going to miss out on a perfectly good excuse to whinge at their parents?
I thought Alex was just translating “Hnnf” for us.