Sundayitis: No, crystals won't stop malware

crystal
I’d almost throw this up as a straight consumer warning, were it not so blatantly ludicrous. Nobody’s actually falling for this… are they?
Image: Sean Creamer
This has bubbled up in my social feed in the last little while, and, while I know people who hold quite strongly to the adherence of what’s commonly called “alternative” medicine, this is just hokum at its finest.

(Collected from the Internet; actual origin unknown)
(Collected from the Internet; actual origin unknown)

How do I put this politely… nah, I don’t. I’ve got to be blunt. Anything that could affect the core programming in your PC isn’t just going to affect viruses and malware; it’d overwrite the applications, operating system and possibly even the BIOS as well. If it actually worked, you’d know as soon as you brought it close enough for it to do anything, because your PC would crash over and over and over again.
Although, as a friend of mine did point out, there could be something to this. Hit your computer with a large enough chunk of malachite enough times, and you’d be completely virus free.
Guaranteed virus free. Also lowers your power bill! ACT NOW BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!!!!*   (*May, which is to say will, void warranty)
Guaranteed virus free. Also lowers your power bill! ACT NOW BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!!!!* (*May, which is to say will, void warranty)

Image: SB
Sundayitis features aren’t particularly serious. Did that really need explaining?

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.