You may be right… I may be crazy…

Another day, another online review. Just don’t ask me about the rest of the day, OK?

Netgear SPH101 Wi-Fi Skype Phone: “Voice quality is always a highly subjective matter when it comes to assessing Skype; some days it’s great, and other days it’s decidedly adkshlal;;;;;;; hisssss….. five dollars!….zzzzzttt… if you know what we mean…”

I like pretty things, and you’re just as pretty as U can be… has another of my reviews up today:

Logitech Squeezebox: “You couldn’t ask for a much simpler audio/Internet radio streamer than the Logitech Squeezebox, although you do pay a premium for that convenience…”

Vworp… Vworp…

Somehow, one of these must be mine.

All mine.

I’ve changed my face, I’ve changed my name, but no-one wants you when you lose…

Well, OK, I haven’t. But I have been busy on the writing front – where the constant clatter of keyboards sends young men to their fiery deaths, and one minute you’re chatting to your mouse; the next it’s a pile of molten goo. I’ve seen things, man. The horror… The horror… where was I? — and anyway, some of my writing is now available for your perusal and purchase at your local emporium of fine printed goods.

Issue #111 (Was a racehorse) of Australian Netguide Magazine is on store shelves now, and it’s just bristling with reviews of mine. Inside, you’ll find reviews of the Canon MD 160, JVC Everio GZ-MG135, Sony DCR-SR42E, Canon DC210, Hitachi DZ-GX5060SW and Sony DCR-DVD708E. They’re all camcorders costing less than AU$1,000. On the standalone reviews front, you’ll also find reviews of the Vodafone 1210 Smartphone, Mitsubishi Diamond Digital DV196SB LCD, Lexmark X2550, Sony Ericsson W200i, Lexar Jumpdrive 360 1GB, WD MyBook World Edition 500GB, PC Tools Desktop Mechanic 2.0, LogMeIn Free, Inkscape, Lord Of The Rings Online: Shadows Of Angmar (PC), Spiderman 3 (PC, Xbox 360, PS2, PS3, PSP, DS, Wii and a partridge in a pear… oh, maybe not that one..), Colin McRae DIRT (PC, Xbox 360, PS3), and Eledees (Wii).Macworld August 07

While you’re down at the newsagents picking up Netguide, you should also chase up the latest issue of Australian Macworld. Partly because they’ve got perhaps the coolest subscription offer I’ve ever seen in a magazine (15% of the subs price goes to World Vision’s Water Health Life Program), but also because I’ve just taken up residency as the opinion columnist on the inside back cover. And surely in a magazine entitled “Macworld”, opening up with a column entitled “47 reasons why you don’t want an iPhone” will win me friends — won’t it? Frankly, if that’s not enough to entice you, then mentioning the absolutely free* picture of the elephant won’t make a difference — will it?

*Free once you buy the mag, that is.

** Dodgy Macworld scan courtesy of Alex’s dodgy scanner.

Solenoid Robot Vs Dalek…

Gentlemen, place your bets now….

And while we’re all waiting for the fate of the known Universe to be decided, why not check out my latest published review, live at

O2 XDA Flame: “This isn’t a phone that slides casually into your pocket. Well, not unless you happen to be Andre The Giant, and as he sadly passed away fourteen years ago, it’s probably safe to say you’re not…”

Further adventures in Administrivia…

Just a few layout updates; the links for “Third Time Round” (my thoughts at the time on becoming a father for, unsurprisingly, the third time) and “The Snip Story” (guaranteed to make certain men wince and certain women crinkle their noses in disapproval) are gone from the right hand side. Click on them above, and you’ll be taken to their new posting homes. You can even add comments now!

And if you’re just here for the Hippo stuff, another Hippo factoid ripped straight from Wikipedia:

” Donna the Hippo, 56, is the oldest known hippo in captivity. She lives at the Mesker Park Zoo in Evansville, Indiana

Visions from the future…

The year is 2021. It is the afternoon, and in the habit of teenagers everywhere, Luc Kidman is just waking up.

Disgracefully Aging Alex: “Luc, wake up. You need to go and walk the hyperdog”

Slothful Teen Luc: “Just gimme fiiiiiive more minutes sleep…”

How did I get this vision of the future, I hear you ask?*

I think this photo gives me something of a vision of that future, not so far away…

Luc Of The Future

Spooky, isn’t it?

Actually, having spent three weeks now as the sole daytime carer of Luc, I’m beginning to think that he’s got something of a drink problem. Let’s review the classic AA symptoms:

What’s the first thing he wants when he gets up? A drink.

Does he often require a drink to help him get to sleep? Yes.

Does he become violent and noisy when he hasn’t had a drink? Yes.

Does his drinking lead to incontinence, blurred speech and poor muscle control? Yes.

Clearly, an intervention is needed. Sure, he’s only a Mummy-milkaholic at this stage, but considering the source can’t even be viewed on TV screens before 9pm at night (and even then only with a specific warning before the program is broadcast), it’s clearly a “gateway drug”. Next thing you know, he’ll be demanding rice crackers (actually, he does this already) and mainlining Milo…

* Well, OK, I didn’t actually hear you. It’s a figure of speech…

The great Australian pastime…

Surely, this should be the next Olympic Sport.

No? Oh, very well then. Back to what you were doing…

(My wife is going to kill me for linking to that. It’s been nice knowing you all…) 

In the world before Monkey, primal chaos reigned…

Luc, our youngest child, turned one yesterday.

Which means he’s technically no longer a baby. And we’re not having any more.

Which means that there will never again be a baby of ours crawling around on the carpet…

If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go and blub in a corner. In a manly and dignified way, naturally…

Planet Earth must now come into balance with the one that caused it all to be…

Two new reviews today, both up at

JBL 420: “JBL’s breathless hype on the back of the very large box that houses the JBL Reference Series 420 Headphones lets you know that they will “kick your listening experience into the future”. We’re not sure if this means that you’ll have to wait to actually hear anything, or you’ll suddenly start hearing next year’s top 40 tunes…”

Motorola ROKR E6: “The E6 tries valiantly to be a smartphone and a sexy consumer gadget. It’s a pity then, that it didn’t try that little bit harder…”