Monthly Archives: January 2006

Some of you undoubtedly went into work — and some of you went back to work, and the prospect of teaching. Others went off to code databases, study law or just maintain networks somewhere. There may have even been some random writing of articles going on, although I wouldn’t know anything about that.

What did I spend my morning doing, I hear you ask?

(You’re not mad if you hear voices where there are none, are you?)

I’m glad you asked. I spent my morning making a Space Invader out of Duplo Blocks. Here he is, in all his glory:

Yes, I know. It’s not totally accurate, but then Duplo is a rather crude medium to be working in.

I did, however, forget the prime rule of creating things. You see, objects take on the properties of that which they are made into — make up a ball, and it’ll roll, and so on. So, if one makes a Space Invader, it shouldn’t surprise anyone that it starts… well… invading.

Thankfully, the Earth was saved by a small belligerent toddler, who quickly saw the alien menace off by smashing it into the table.

I’ll let my tiny audience decide on this one, but my personal opinion, as of the now, is that this is the single best name for an application ever.

Time for a family update, methinks — this isn’t just meant to cover my professional life, after all. After all, there’s an important anniversary coming up…

Y’see, a little under a year ago — February 7th, to be precise — I took over fulltime care of my two children for the first time. Scary stuff, let me tell you. Let’s take stock, shall we?

In just under a year:

* Approximately 500 stories have been told, with a strong propensity towards stories featuring Muppets, Puppies or Bananas.
* I’ve prepared roughly 300 meals, some of which were even edible
* Roughly 3,000,000 gallons of bath water have been splashed all over me during bath time. Oh, wait, it just feels like that
* I’ve only shouted about ten times. That’s per half-hour over the last year, mind you.

A quick stocktake seems appropriate as well:

At 7/2/05

Number of Daddies: 1
Number of Mummies: 1
Number of toddlers: 1
Number of babies: 1

At 27/01/06

Number of Daddies: 1
Number of Mummies: 1
Number of “Big Girls”: 1
Number of toddlers: 1
Number of babies: 0.33

That’s superb capital growth. Why, at this rate, by the year 2525, Kidmans will make up roughly 792% of the world’s population!*

That also seems like the perfect segue into the latest scan of Kidman Junior. Taken last week as part of a nuchal translucency, they show the latest addition to the clan staring at one of its own feet. There’s a jawline, some nasal features, and we’re assured it has a brain. No idea where it got that one, really.

Current week count is 13 weeks (as of tomorrow); if we can make it through another 22 weeks without problems it’ll beat the records of its older brother and sister — but that seems like such a long time ago.

*Allowing for slight statistical error, and the possibility that I might be making it all up.

To think, that all those years of gameplay were actually preparing me to be a great parent!

And to all the naysayers out there who thought I was wasting my time in front of a joypad: In your face, world!

Dangit, the TV just exploded. Anyone got a cheap (and good) LCD panel they’d like to send my way?

(Yes, I know, as an experienced consumer IT journo, technically I should know the answer to that question (in most civilised cases, it’s “No, you bloody scrounger”), but this is THE INTERNET, and stupid begging appeals often work. See MillionDollarHomepage, or SaveToby for examples).

Not to note and celebrate my elder brother’s birthday today.

Hurrah!

Then again, I’m at home, sick, with two kids, and he’s in Vegas, probably firmly ensconced in a mountain of dodgy consumer electronics and even more dodgy silicon cleavages. He’s no doubt celebrating enough for both of us.

(It would be doubly remiss of me not to mention that it’s also my nephew Charlie’s birthday. That one I did forget. Oops. It’s a good job I have a beautiful and talented wife, eh readers?)