Goin’ to the chapel and we’re….

Likely to come third…

Well, that’s not how the lyric goes, but anyway; I’ve been nominated for two Lizzies, for Best Gaming Journalist (a category where I’ve been highly commended in the past) and Best Technology Reviewer (a category where I’m truly thrilled to have been nominated, especially in the company of the other nominees). Meanwhile, my alleged clone has gotten nods for the Helen Dancer Best Consumer Technology Journalist and Best Features Journalist; this means I can cheer him on in his categories without damaging my own slim chances. Hurrah!

If I were a betting man, looking at the Lizzies field, I’d have to put some money on either Tim Dean or Jeanne Vida-Douglas (who, despite years of my pleading, refuses to call her child “Snoop Doggy” Douglas), both of whom managed the rare feat of garnering four nominations — good for them and well deserved — whereas I wouldn’t be advising anyone to bet the farm on me. Then again, stranger things have happened…

In other publishing news, CNET.com.au has another of my reviews up:

Acer TravelMate C200: Acer’s Travelmate C200 is a convertible tablet PC in a moderately sized casing with one interesting quirk…

Maple Syrup and Jam

Games-related hilarity abounds, with 3DAvenue publishing my review of Sony’s interesting-but-flawed 24: The Game: “It’s universally accepted that Jack Bauer’s a very, very hard man that you don’t want to cross. Ever. Well, unless you enjoy the idea that your last few seconds on this earth will be spent staring down the barrel of his gun — and that the proceeding twenty minutes of your existence will have been spent being pistol whipped by this very same firearm. “

Splish splash splosh!

Various notes and news for today:

There’s a new entry in Third Time Round, for those who are interested in the ongoing process of parenting.

There’s a pair of my product reviews up at CNET.com.au:

Philips 32PF9830 LCD TV: If you’re after a TV to impress people with the quality that LCD can deliver, there are few models that can line up with Philips Philips 32PF9830.

NetComm V35 portable USB VoIP speakerphone: The V35 ranks among the easiest bits of technology to install we’ve ever seen…

And it’s Friday. That’s got to count for something, surely?

Delta Goodrem stole my son’s shoes…

There’s big news afoot, but I’m too brain frazzled to write in detail about it right now. Expect an update to Third Time Round shortly.

Instead, I’m going to complain. Bloody Delta Goodrem tried (but failed) to steal my 2 year old son’s shoes…

Well, not exactly steal. Still. I need to vent somehow. Having dealt with last night’s dramatics (that’s the stuff I still have to mentally process and then I’ll write about it in the proper context), I headed out today to the Macquarie Shopping Centre to buy James some shoes — specifically there because it’s the nearest Big W, and they tend to have a decent range of cheapish kids shoes. Cheap kids shoes are a must, partly for wear and tear reasons, but mostly because they grow out of them so very quickly.

Unfortunately for me, I scheduled this visit to Big W right when Delta — Wikipedia tells me she’s “Australia’s sweetheart” — was doing an instore appearance. Now, she’s an ex-TV star and local pop celebrity. So, where do you think they put her to do her signing — or singing — or perhaps disembowelling budgies live on stage, for all I really care?

If you picked A) In the music department, you’d be wrong.
If you picked B) In the TV department, you’d be wrong.
If you even picked C) In the DVD department, near her DVDs, you’d still be wrong.

No, the correct answer is D) In the toddler shoes department. In the boy’s toddler shoes department. It all makes so much sense, doesn’t it? Well, except that her entire fanbase at the store appeared to all be about 12 years old, dazzlingly pink and resolutely female. Perhaps Delta’s got a secret (and rather disgusting) fetish that has previously been kept under tight PR control..

So, instead of a careful and considered trawl through teeny-tiny sneakers, I instead found myself surrounded by this teeming, swarming and glowing pink mass, alternately screaming and chanting DELTA-DELTA-DELTA like a bunch of badly programmed terminators. With two kids to control. And no space to move. And very little in the way of breathable air. Did I mention the badly tuned and positioned speakers blasting out “Out Of The Blue” in an insanely repetitive loop?

It was then that my stupidly stubborn gene — a Kidman specialty — kicked in, and I decided, come what may, that Delta Bloody Goodrem wasn’t going to stop my boy from having new shoes. So, despite the screaming — which was so loud that my daughter curled up into a ball and hid at the back of our stroller — and despite the hordes of shrill tweenage skanks — I gritted my teeth, tried to block my ears and tried shoes until I found the right pair. My resolve didn’t quite last to trying to find a matching pair of socks, though.

Bloody Delta Goodrem… I even got ignored by Rah and Magic Dan on the drive out when they nearly crunched into me in the Rah-mobile on the way out of the parking lot. From now on, I’ll be blaming everything on either Cashews or Delta Goodrem. Maybe both.

19 weeks to go…

Something new today, with my musings on becoming a father for the third time getting a page all of their own. With pictures. Of babies. That you haven’t seen before (unless you’re my wife, who’s rather more familiar with what an ultrasound of her innards looks like than I suspect she’d like to be).

There’s also a link on the right hand column; this should update on a semi-regular basis. We shall see.

Uh-oh. I’m getting that feeling again…

Another day, and more online publishing malarkey:

CNET.com.au once again comes through with another review of mine:

Linksys WRT54G3G: The Linksys WRT54G3G does an admirable job of simply and seamlessly sharing a Vodafone 3G data connection.

At the same time, the top two (and three of the top four) phone reviews in the Top Phones Of February were written by me — the O2 XDA Atom, Nokia N70 and O2 XDA II Mini, respectively. As someone who shall remain nameless and who may read this would say, Yay me.

Meanwhile, one of my Netguide features has also made it online. Specifically, it’s a guide I wrote for Netguide on the best tech gadgets for under $50.

Bad luck apparently travels in threes

And I’ve already had two of my three.

#1: Stop breathing for a period of time; don’t sleep thereafter (see previous entries for more details)

#2: This morning, the bookcase/shelf in the laundry collapsed. Much broken glass, bits of bent metal, dented tins of catfood and a massive, rotting shelf that i had to lug out of the laundry somehow. Except that it’s already full of the stuff that was up on the deck, so it’s twice as hard. My back and shoulders currently feel like they’re going to beat my lungs to collapsing.

At this rate, bad luck #3 is going to involve falling elephants…

In the tree by the brook there’s a songbird who sings…

Nothing, it seems, can stop the tide of the presses with my name within — not even my worrying near-expiry. Oh well.

3DAvenue.com has my review up of Shadow Of The Colossus: Play Shadow Of The Colossus, and you’ll either agree, or want my head on a stick. The choice is yours…

And the latest issue of PC User is out — or at least, they’ve sent me a copy — and I’m all over it, *and* in the contributors panel — I’ve hit the double!

In particular, you’ll find an Alex-penned guide to the best broadband deals nationwide, as well as standalone reviews of Netcomm’s Homeplug Turbo and Norton Ghost… and others, but they skip my mind right now. I blame cashews. Then again, I’ll probably be blaming cashews for all sorts of things from now on…

Someone saved my life tonight…

(Well, to be strictly accurate, it was yesterday. But that’s not what Elton John sang, and I can’t find any song references to cashews)

Yesterday didn’t exactly go as planned — well, at least for half of it. Off to Church on Sunday morning (as is our normal habit), and as part of the sermon, our minster handed out cashews (don’t ask, and if you want to berate me for attending a church service, you’re seriously at the wrong blog). I’ve never had a problem with cashews, so I chomped away merrily.

The service ended, and we headed in to do some light shopping, including some new sneakers for me, as my existing ones (which were IT-vendor-branded anyway) were covered in tiling cement. As we drew into the carpark, my windpipe decided to draw closed — very suddenly indeed. Imagine, if you will, your entire throat throbbing and swelling up to twice its normal size, while your windpipe within suddenly contracts to the size of the straw that comes with Juice poppers.

All within about five seconds.

I managed to gasp out to Di that I couldnt’ breathe, and she rushed me to hospital. I had visions of waiting and gasping in the emergency ward, but to their credit I only had to croak out that I couldn’t breathe and the hospital staff had me on a bed, canula in arm being pumped full of steroids, while the other was hooked up to blood pressure, oxygen saturation and heartbeat monitors. Uncomfortable isn’t the word, but it sure beats being dead.

The drugs they had me on made me massively drowsy, but this was seriously annoying, as the beds in emergency were clearly built for Dorothy’s Munchkins — lying flat on my back, which I had to, due to the sensors and tubes sticking out of me, there was no way to actually sleep.

Six hours later I hadn’t relapsed, so they let me go home, where I collapsed into a torpor in bed, pretty much for the whole night. So much for getting lots of work done on Sunday, and so much for things like cashews, peanut butter, gleefully ignoring “may contain traces of nuts” labels on product packaging and even Chili sauce! (those who want more reading on the topic can look here)

Right. Now to deal with Monday. Hopefully it’ll be a bit quieter.